Writing Plan

Writing plan for CatW

What aspects I need for improving my writing are developing ideas (valid evidence) and grammar.

 Develop ideas.

 First, I have to make sure that I pick up what is the right main idea of the prompt. Consider carefully what story or evidence I can use from my knowledge or experience for supporting my thesis statement. (This is important! Because my ideas often fly away from thesis)

Second, Make sure using reference. I often use my personal experience for all supporting ideas. Make up!! (other articles, documentaries)

Make sure to coherent all supporting ideas to my thesis statement.

Grammar

Be more careful for simple mistakes, such as Subject-Verb Agreement, Article, Word form, Verb Tense, and Missing word. After finish the writing, read and fix the grammar errors.

Do not try to make sentences difficult or long. Make simple sentences. Break down my thought into simple and brief sentences. (To express my though simple way) Avoid making unclear sentences.

How Your Birth Order Influences Your Life Adjustment

How Your Birth Order Influences Your Life Adjustment

            In the article, “How Your Birth Order Influences Your Life Adjustment,” the author, Lucille Forer writes how people’s birth order influences people’s characters. The author says that other family members’ expectations toward each child according to their birth order decide their roles in their family, and the roles become part of his/her self-concept. I agree with author’s idea that “Birth order influences him to develop certain attitudes toward other people and helps him develops specific patterns of behavior.”

            I have two sisters back in my country, Japan, and I am a middle child. Each character or behavior exactly represent typical birth other characteristic. My elder sister is very responsible. My younger sister knows there are others around to take care of her. As the writer say that expectation of certain behavior toward him/her depends on each birth order develops their part of self-concept, we all expect certain roles toward each sibling. My parents have expected my elder sister to take care of me and my younger sister since I was born. She took me with her when she play with her friends, and took care of my study and homework in our childhood. She is a very responsible woman because she has been raised to be responsible by my parents’ expectation.

            My younger sister has been taken care of well by all our family members. She is our family’s mood maker. Everybody loves her. We are all willing to take care of her because of her certain attitude. Her attitude or behavior make us think that she is less able to do things than us, so we take care of her, even she is the real smartest in our sibling. My younger sister is now 29 years old, she is fully grown woman; however, her attitude and behavior still represents that she is a baby one in my family. It is because we also still expect her to do so.

            In my country, japan, people think that blood type also determines certain behavior in part of our characteristics. We sometimes guess people’s blood type by observing their behavior, and it actually works. However, I read an article, and it says that we develop our certain behavior depending on blood type because we learn and act what characteristic we have according to our blood type from our childhood. Other words, information of blood type characteristics develop our self-concept.

            We have acted certain roles according to other’s expectation from in our childhood. If you have acted certain role from your childhood, it becomes part of your real characteristic. Birth order influences people’s characteristics with other expectation.

Heroic Acts and Heroic Personalities

Heroic Act and Heroic Personalities

                Aspects of hero are many. People say hero is someone who is strong, brave, selfless and so on. There are two hero in the movie, “Hero.” One is actually saved many people from the plain crush, and another is showing his personalities as hero. When we think about “Hero,” which is more qualified called as “Hero,”- Heroic acts or heroic personalities.

                When people think about people as “hero,” we come up names of famous people, such as Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King … etc. They accomplished their faith or belief, and also their actual activities changed the world. Those activities are saved many people.  I believe that “Hero” is someone who act as hero is more qualified called as “Hero.”

                In the movie, Bernard LaPlante rescued many people from plain crush, but this act opposed from his characteristic. His personality is self- centered, and he is a thief. In fact, he was in jail with commitment of card fraud. However, I believe that he is a real “Hero” because of his heroic act. First, he saved many people’s lives from plain crush with taking risks of his own life. Moreover, he decided to go back to the airplane with pouring smoke to rescue the guy whose son asked him to do. Second, he is humble and brave enough giving up his credit for his friend, John Bubber, and he keep people believe that John is hero. He might did not want disappoint people with discovering that real hero has back ground of legal problem. Bernard LaPlante has problem with his personality; however, he is the guy who go for others to rescue them even he jeopardize himself. Moreover, no one is brave enough to go into lion cage in a zoo for helping kid, except “Hero.” Heroic act is significant aspect of real “Hero.”

                Some people think that person who has               heroic personality is more qualified as “Hero” than person whose act is heroic. However, I believe that person who has heroic personality is not enough to called ‘Hero.” They are honest and good person, but not an actual “Hero.” In the movie, John is the person who people want to believe or wish ideal “Hero” looks like, selfless, caring others and charming. There are many people who are qualified called as “Good person,” in the world but not “Hero.”

                In conclusion, people whose act is heroic are more qualified called “Hero” than people whose personalities are heroic. “Hero” is someone who can actually take their own risks for others.

Is Music a Good Tool for Health? rewite #2

In the article, “Is Music a Good Tool for Health?,” the author, Elizabeth Scott, writes how music affects our bodies and minds. Scott reports that music therapy has been expanding its use in medical field because it positively affects for easing symptoms of patients in many ways. The author also reports that strong beat of music can stimulate our brainwaves, which means strong beat helps to create shaper concentration, and slower beats helps people calm and relax. Music also can bring slower breathing and slower heart rate to people. Music profoundly affects our bodies and minds. I agree with the author’s idea that “music affects the body and mind in many powerful ways.”

Strong beat provides me sharp concentration, but it also boosts my body’s energy in a gym. I usually run an hour with listening music in the gym. It is my routine; however, if I run without music, I cannot run even 30 minutes. When I listen to strong beat music, my mind is more concentrate on running and my energy goes up. It feels like I could run limitless.  Listening strong beat music boosts my energy to run long distance. Music has a great effect on our brains and makes us more energetic.

Aroma therapy is used for meditation or releasing people’s stress, and music therapy is also used for making people relaxed.  As the author mentions that music can bring slower breathing and heart rate, most massage salons in spas uses combination of aroma therapy and music therapy for releasing customer’s chronic stress. They use the sound of a murmuring of a stream or slower music to synchronize customer’s heart rate and make them relaxed. Music therapy has a power to calm and relaxed people, so people can heal and release their stress.

Music is great tool for making people more energetic and healing their mind. This is why music has been growing its use for medical field. Music is great natural medication without side effects.

Individualism in Group

In the article,” Individualism in Groups,” the author discusses how people act differently when they are in a group or by themselves. The author brings two experiments to support this idea. One experiments is students act differently when smoke pours in to the classroom. Students who were by themselves acted faster than students who were in a group. Another experiment also shows people acting differently when they hear a loud crash and scream. People who are alone go to help others often then people who were in a group. The author explains that because responsibilities are allocated when people are in a group, they do not feel individually responsible. I agree with the author’s idea that “diffusion of responsibility ” or “social loafing” makes people lazy.

            When I came to the U.S., I had to find an apartment to for myself. I could not speak English at all, but I pushed myself to contact people on a craigslist who are looking for a roommate. I started looking for apartments before my dormitory contract expired. I finally found ones, and I was there for two years. After lease expired, I had to move again. Second time I moved, I had a roommate and together we looked for an apartment. However, because of  “diffusion of responsibility,” I became lazy and let her do hard work of looking. People can become lazier when more people share responsibilities.

            This experiment reminds me of that Management Text Book from Management class. In the textbook, there is explanation of advantages and disadvantages of large group meetings. Large group meetings can produce many ideas; however, individuals tend to participate less at the meetings. Small group meetings offer a better chance of speaking up because each member feels responsible.

            “Diffusion of responsibility” occurs everywhere. In the classroom, when there are more students in the class, more students become observers. Students also hesitate and wait for others to start participating when professors or teachers ask questions. These students tell themselves that someone else will raise their hand. This is the most common form of  “diffusion of responsibility.”

            People act differently when they are in a group or by themselves. People tend to become lazy and hesitate to do their part because of allocating their responsibility. 

Is Music a Good Tool for Health?

In the article, “ Is Music a Good Tool for Health?,” the author, Elizabeth Scott, writes how music affects our bodies and minds. Scott reports that music therapy has been expanding its use in medical field because it is positively affected for easing symptoms of patients in many ways. The author also reports that strong beat of music can stimulate our brainwaves, which means strong beat help to create shaper concentration, and slower beats helps people calm and relax. Music also can bring slower breathing and slower heart rate to people. Music is profoundly affected our bodies and minds. I agree with this article because of several reasons.

                Strong beat provides me sharp concentration, but is also boosts may body’s energy in a gym. I usually run an hour with listening music in the gym. It is my routine; however, if I run without music, I cannot run even 30 minutes. Listening strong beat music boosts my energy to run long distance. Music is affected our brains and make us more energetic.

                When I want to meditate or relax end of a day from stressful life, I use aroma therapy and music therapy. Burning my favorite aroma oil in a small pot, and listening a slower music which is created for meditate use relax my stiffed mind from daily life. Especially, a beat from the slower music is synchronized my heart rate, and calm me down peacefully. Music therapy is helpfully affected our mind.

                Music is great tool for making people more energetic and healing their mind. This is why music has been growing its use for medical field. Music is great natural medicine without side effects.

#5

When we were children, we believed a lot of things, such as ghosts, monsters, angels or witches.  However, after we grown up, we became not to believe those things anymore.  It is natural to believe only what you see when you become adults, but I am still wondering whether ghosts are truly exist or not.

Some my friends say they have seen ghosts. Kenta is one of the friends who have seen ghosts. We have been friend for a long time. However, after couple of years later we started being friend, he confided his secret that he can see ghost to me. He started to talk a story that the day we had been to a beach for BBQ with other friends a years ago from that day. The day we went to the beach was clouded and the sea was rough; however, we enjoyed the BBQ. We drunk a little bit, and one of friends started to swam to a small craggy on the sea. We followed him, and every body swum to the craggy except Kenta. We called him, but he stubbornly refused to come into the sea. His face was stiffened and pale. I remembered the expression in his face because it was unusual of him. The day he confided the secret, he explained what happened the day. He said he saw the ghosts, so he could not go into the sea.

I have heard many ghost stories from friends. I do not think they are lying or just made up those stories. However, I cannot surely believe the existence of ghost because I have never seen them, or I might just do not want believed them. Anyhow, I am wondering whether ghosts are truly exist or not.